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Finally, a sport that we can win at half the time.

Illinois (0-0) vs. Colgate (0-0)

Time: 7pm Central
TV: None, if you have a subscription
Line: None

You've done it, Illini fan. You survived nine weeks of the worst college football season in the history of the world since the last worst season. It wasn't easy. At times you weren't sure you'd make it.

At times you weren't sure you wanted to make it.

The gun, sitting there on the edge of the table, calling to you like some siren in a poem by Homer. But you were able to ignore her charms. You knew that if you hung in long enough, and rode through the storm that salvation would come to you.

And it's here, friend. Basketball season begins tonight.

It can't guarantee you glory.

It can't even guarantee you competency.

But it can guarantee you it won't be football. For now, that's enough.